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Dave Ramsey is America's trusted voice on money and business, and CEO of Ramsey Solutions. He has authored seven best-selling books, including The Total Money Makeover. The Dave Ramsey Show is heard by more than 12 million listeners each week on 575 radio stations and multiple digital platforms. Follow Dave on Twitter at @DaveRamsey and on the web at daveramsey.com. |
Having an emergency fund is a good idea. You and your spouse should be on the same page regarding this. You both have a say and you need to speak up. Honesty Is a Necessity Dear Dave, After hearing you talk about financial infidelity, I have to admit that I hide money from my husband. I have been setting aside money for emergencies without his knowledge. He is not terrible with money, but he always seems to find something to spend it on. Before I started doing this, we never managed to save much money at all. But now I feel like I have been doing something wrong. What should I do? Lana Dear Lana, I believe in saving up for emergencies. I mean, I’m the guy who tells people to have three to six months of expenses saved in an emergency fund, right? But deception is never a positive thing in a relationship—especially a marriage. You need to talk to your husband about this. I know it won’t be easy for you, so you have to make sure you tell him in the right way. Playing the blame game won’t help. Basically, you’ve beendeceiving him about this. Sure, it sounds like he has been immature when it comes to your household finances, but you made the decision to hide things. You chose to do this instead of talking to him about your concerns. Managing money in a marriage isn’t a “his” or “hers” thing. It’s a “we” thing. You can fix this, but it’s going to take some honesty, understanding and making an effort to work together toward the same goals—like saving or living on a written, monthly budget. You each have a vote, but it also means you have to stand up and vote no, Lana, if he wants to blow money on silly stuff when you guys don’t have your finances in order. - Dave |
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